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You're sweet
Off the Wall
June 2, 2011
One day last month,
my daughter and I were having a nice phone conversation when
all of a sudden she blurted out, "Dad, you're so sweet."
I responded by saying telling her that expression just may be
the topic of an upcoming story. And so I begin.
I have often felt that those words were a woman thing. No guy
up to the present time has ever approached me stating, "Hey
Pee Vee, you're sweet. Guys just aren't addressed in that fashion.
Thinking of the handful of friends that I do have, I can't imagine
telling my fishing buddy, "Hey Steve, you're so sweet for
tying on my fishing lure." "Hey Tom, aren't you sweet
for finding that Bible verse for me," or "Mark, I want
to tell you how sweet it was that you drove me to Greensburg
recently."
Throughout the ages of growing up, I always heard this word,
"sweet" used by females in expressing an attitude of
affection. "Oh Pee Vee, you're so sweet to bring the hymnals
up to us from downstairs," or "Paul, it was sweet of
you to hold the door open for that elderly lady as she was getting
into her car." And finally, "You're wife must really
love you, because you're such a sweet person."
I never thought of myself as being sweet - manly, but not sweet.
I think sweet comes with "sugar and spice and everything
nice," but not adjectives used toward men, particularly
me.
My parents nor my brother or sister never called me "sweet"
as I was growing up. I somehow can't hear my mother saying, "Paul,
honey, it would be sweet of you if you could take out the garbage."
I know honey and sweetness go together, but, personally speaking,
I don't recollect her ever using the word, "honey,"
either. It was more of a please and thank you thing. We were
raised to be polite without all the sugary stuff added as a filler.
The other day I got a phone call from a gent asking me if I could
do him a favor. Not being particularly alert first thing in the
morning, I asked to whom I may be speaking. His response was,
"Bet you thought you were talking to Prince William."
Then he told me his name, and my gray matter (which could be
white this time of the morning) clicked in and then knew for
sure that it wasn't the famous gent from England. After listening
to his request, I answered to the affirmative to which he replied,
"Boy, that is so sweet of you."
Here's a man complimenting another man that he is sweet. That
was a first-timer for me. All I could think of was, maybe in
his upbringing he and his mother or other family members exchanged
this word loosely as he passes the word around freely.
So, maybe I have to conclude it isn't a woman thing after all.
A few weeks ago, I was invited to a lavish dinner held in Irwin
to raise money for the Catholic Charities organization. As I
seared the dining area for my table, I found my seat and sat
down. Everything was laid out so eloquently. Visually, I was
taking it all in at a record speed.
In front of my place mat were a number of take-home gifts, one
of which included a gold, square box with a ribbon around it.
Examining it closely, I noticed the words "Chocolates"
on the top lid. The first words that ran through my mind were,
"Isn't that sweet!" I really didn't mean that as a
pun, but it did come out that way, there's no getting around
that. I laughed out loud a bit and then more to myself and then
realized I had used the word, too.
Since few people had seated themselves around the large, circular
tables, I began to think back if I ever had used that word before
as I did here descriptively. Nothing came to mind. I concluded
that this may have been one of the first times I referred to
something using that phrase of words.
At the end of one day last week, exhausted as I was, I pounced
in the Lazy Boy and grabbed the clicker and decided to see what
television show would help relax me. Since I love music, I stopping
at a singing competition program. Watching the coach aid a young
lady sing a song, she told her, "You have a very sweet voice.
Use it wisely."
Now that is the way I've heard this adjective used. On the other
hand, "sweet" could be used in reference to many other
things as well, I have no doubt about that.
In closing, wavering thoughts started coming to mind as I wrote
this column. First and foremost, are individuals going to start
referring my acts of kindness as being "sweet?" I can
just hear it now from one of my superiors at The Latrobe Bulletin.
"Gee, Pee Vee, you were so sweet to take that picture of
the mayor at city hall." Or, one of my friends will throw
a zinger at me stating, "Hey Paul, it was sweet of you to
order that compact disc for me." And third, I hope daughter
dear keeps up her habit. Makes me feel good.
Paul J. Volkmann
Written: May 7, 2011
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