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Ad lip
Off the
Wall
April
12, 2007
Not long ago, as many of you probably have known,
I ran classified advertisements in the newspapers to get rid
of my merchandise. Most the time, my efforts were very worthwhile.
After all, the tabloids were distributed in many surrounding
towns.
In most cases, a person responding would ask, "I
am calling about the fishing items ad in the newspaper. Where
are you located and when can I come in." I'd tell him or
her and the person would hang up.
But, that wasn't always the case.
One lady called me from Penn Hills concerning my
display cases. Once we got over the fact that I didn't have what
she wanted, I made the mistake of telling her I grew up in Oakmont.
Minutes later, she proceeded to tell me her health problems,
how she was going to have need of knee surgery and her various
operations in the last ten years.
Now, I don't usually mind listening to people when
I have time. Sometimes such necessities exist when persons are
lonely or, in some cases, just like to talk. But she had called
right after I had retired, and I was definitely ready for some
shuteye and was fighting Mr. Sandman.
Just as I was trying to keep my wits about me and
remaining cool and collected, she asked me if I had heard about
the home invasions in Oakmont. I answered in the affirmative.
"Well," she said, "My son was the man responsible
for capturing the two men responsible for the break-ins."
I thought to myself, "Oh, oh, here goes another chapter
in my book titled The Night I Couldn't Sleep."
I knew what lay ahead, and I was not wrong. If there
was ever a time I didn't want to hear the step by step process
of how the culprits were captured and where, this was it. After
begging with the woman that I really had to get some rest, she
finally got the hint and let me hang up the phone and escape
into dreamland USA.
Sometimes, I think people respond to ads just for
the need of having someone to talk to regardless who answers
on the other end of the line.
I have to admit, I was the guilty party when a woman
called from Oakmont concerning my commercial refrigerator. I
asked her where she lived in my old home town. She told me the
street. It turned out to be the one adjoining the one where I
lived. I didn't talk much about the unit. We had a great chat
about the people in her neighborhood.
I've been striking 1000 with this wonderful newspaper
concerning the free giveaway section. Three different times I
put things in there and they all went. But beware. This may be
the place where those whom want to talk may continue exchanging
thoughts. The great thing is you will get rid of your items if
you display some character.
Here are some little tricks I learned in dealing
with the public when it comes to talking to others. One, be friendly
and two, display some excitement in your voice when persons respond
to your ad. That will put the callers at ease and erase the fears
the person placing the ad may be a hard person with which to
deal.
Third, talk about other things that you may want
to sell. After all, as the television expression goes, "This
is your air time."
For example, when I placed my ad concerning my fishing
items going for cost and less,
I also mentioned the fact that I had two display cases for sale
as well. One Saturday, a man and his son showed up at my store
to purchase what I thought was something pertaining to my fishing
ad only to find out that he wanted to see the larger of the two
cases.
One chap called me from Greensburg concerning one
of my ads. We talked a little bit and then he stopped abruptly.
He told me his name and paused again. He then blurted out
"Are you Pee Vee?" "Yup!" I responded. He
was a retiree from Kennametal whom I knew when I worked there.
We talked about old times and the present.
The next thing I just may advertise might be my
lawn mower. It's an oldie but goodie. My son said I should put
it on eBay, but then who would I talk to? No fun to that!
Paul j. volkmann
3/13/2007
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