|
An era error
Off the Wall
June 7, 2007
Face it, folks. That basin we so commonly refer
to as the bath tub sure wasn't sized for people these days. I
realize that most people (I'm not one of them) fill the thing
up with maybe a foot of water, slowly immerse themselves in the
heat of the matter and commence with activities.
You might refer to me as a soaker. I fill my tub
about eight inches from the top and then lay there taking in
the beauty of the warmth before coating that cloth with the green
lather.
Here's the problem. Anyone moving into an old house
as I did will probably tell you that those basins of ancient
times are just too small. I measured the flat surface on the
bottom and it was barely two feet across by 40 inches long.
The only conclusion I could draw is that people
back in the early 1900's must have been a whole lot shorter not
to mention more slender. Now they are taller and fatter.
Now I know companies are making all different types
of bathing units nowadays that have doors on the side and circulating
devices to spit the water out underneath the surface to massage
the body. Swell. That's great if you have a big house with plenty
of room.
But I feel only the affluent can afford such luxuries.
Maybe in my new house (which will probably be an
old house) I wouldn't mind having a shower/bathtub combined.
But I have a sneaking suspicion that the bathtub will be the
same size as mine here at my present location.
Even in the newer hotels I've visited when I've
gone to visit my daughter in Baltimore, I've noticed the combos
have the same size bathtub as mine. I consider that an era error.
My son was so excited when he moved from our house
to his present home in Oakmont. He exclaimed, "Dad, you'd
love it down here. I have a shower." It's been so long since
I've stood under one, I almost forget what it feels like.
I'm not so sure I'd really care for one. After all,
I can't fully submerge my body under the water entirely if I'm
not in a bathtub. Second, the temperature is much easier to control.
Too often, usually while being on retreats or other places, the
temperature will turn really quickly while I'm standing there,
and I'll either go into a deep freeze or face a brief scalding.
Neither is fun to any extent.
Now, I'm the type that likes to lay prone in the
tub (keeping my head above water, of course). The real problem
I run into is that I am over 40 inches long (I'm stating this
for those who have yet to meet me). What results is that I either
end up sitting up, freezing my upper torso, or lying on my back,
with my feet climbing the wall. If I keep switching back and
forth, I make a watery mess of the bathroom. It turns out to
be a lose-lose situation.
If these companies are going to reform these units,
in addition to making them longer, I suggest the hot and cold
knobs be put on the side near the shoulder area. That way when
the temperatures cool, the hot water knob could be rotated for
another surge of hot water.
I'd recommend keeping the spout at the foot as well as the drain.
That way the hot liquid would make its way gradually up my lower
area to the rest of my person.
At the present, I use my feet to turn on the knob.
Sometimes that doesn't work and I have to sit up, learn way over
and make the adjustments. I know, I can just hear someone saying,
"Poor little boy." Hey, this is supposed to be a time
of relaxation. This is my time off from by busy retirement schedule.
Have a heart!
I read recently that "The United States is
one of the few countries where most citizens consider a daily
bath to be a necessity by means of a shower. A bath is now a
way to relax, not something you do before going to work in the
morning."
Isn't that what I've been telling you? I'm to take
it easy. Now, where do I put my feet?
Paul j. volkmann
5/4/07
|